“Entertainment Tonight” will not be airing any glossy segments on inflation — not until the cost of hairspray and eyeliner spikes and wreaks havoc on its operational budget.
It’s not news! Who said it was news? Do you think a column about a “Platinum Jubbly” typo on royal souvenirs came out of a news meeting? Do you go to McDonald’s to order a copy of Stephen Hawking’s “A Brief History of Time”? Entertainment sections are, by design, counterprogramming the “news.” My job is mostly to provide a two-minute break from all the rotten things that are happening.
But in this case, I can’t defend stories about Snoop smoking weed just before Sunday’s performance because that is what he does every day.
You know how people sometimes wake up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom? Snoop wakes up to toke or recite a funny story to his bong.
Are people really shocked Snoop smoked up just before his Super Bowl performance? I once saw him deliver an intimate rap set at a club and he was puffing while performing.
If someone told me to close my eyes and visualize dope or hash or ganja or hemp or bhang, my mind’s eye would instantly see Snoop in sunglasses, exhaling a contrail while holding up a spliff and looking at it with pure love, like a parent gazing at a newborn.
And that’s why we in the entertainment press need to create a global moratorium on reporting about his light ’em up proclivities, be it at the Super Bowl, in a club or while shopping on Melrose.
Or why would he start by hanging upside down, looking like a bloated Houdini in an escape trick gone wrong? Eminem might have also been on to something.
Based on his wild success as a rapper and entrepreneur, it’s almost as if his body metabolizes cannabis as a performance-enhancing drug.